Category: Brain Chatter

How Bernadett Bled Her Way Through The May Issue of O Magazine

Have you ever wanted to call in sick to work because you had cramps, heavy bleeding, been emotionally and physically exhausted and didn’t feel like being half naked in a room full of people, where you are the main focus? I found myself facing that very situation. At a recent shoot for O, the Oprah Magazine, where I’d been asked to model lingerie for their yearly Body Issue, a testament to body love and self acceptance, but this time, I couldn’t call out sick.  As I walked into the brightly lit photography studio, I saw the racks of nude lingerie awaiting me, as well as my co-model for the shoot, a beautiful, elegant size-zero model resembling Lupita Nyong’o.…

My Super Bowl Prediction Based On: Fashion and Image

Of course you’re interested in knowing my fashionably professional, non-judgmental uninformed football opinion on who will win Super Bowl 2014.  The reason you may care is because if I pick the winner and get anywhere near the right final score, you may just say, hey this red head knows a thing or two about predicting a game based solely on the uniforms and the image each coach portrays.…

FIFTY SHADES OF STEAK

I’ve been having a ton of sex lately.  It’s been pretty amazing.  It happens about 3-4 times a day.  Sometimes it’s long carried out passionate sessions and sometimes they are brief–small and just the right amount.   I entered this relationship about a year ago.  It began rather slowly.  We were kids when we met.  Who is this person you ask?  Well, it’s not a person.  …

Glossary to Bernadett’s language

I abbreviate almost everything.  So if I were to rewrite the previous sentence it would read: I abreev ev.  These are common Bern (what my friends call me) terms my friends hear me use: PMS= Perfect Man Shoe LSD= Long Sexy Dress (you must be height appropriate to make LSD work) LBD= Little Black Dress BS= Blue Shoes SIT ON YOUR MOUTH= (Loose Hungarian to English saying)= Stop Talking YUMMA LAMMA DING DONG= Delicious, Thank You, More Please LYLT= Love You Long Time BALOOBAS= Insanity/Crazy/Out Of This World FU-N= Fun BONJOUR= Hello MERRY CHRISTMAS= When I Say Bye to Someone Cuz Everyone is Usually so Damn Cheery During the Holidays NOSTUESO= No one speaks twice until everyone speaks once (learned this during my corps year at City Year).…