Have you ever wanted to call in sick to work because you had cramps, heavy bleeding, been emotionally and physically exhausted and didn’t feel like being half naked in a room full of people, where you are the main focus? I found myself facing that very situation. At a recent shoot for O,
the Oprah Magazine, where I’d been asked to model lingerie for their yearly Body Issue, a testament to body love and self acceptance, but this time, I couldn’t call out sick.
As I walked into the brightly lit photography studio, I saw the racks of nude lingerie awaiting me, as well as my co-model for the shoot, a beautiful, elegant size-zero model resembling
Lupita Nyong’o.…
Of course you’re interested in knowing my fashionably professional, non-judgmental uninformed football opinion on who will win Super Bowl 2014. The reason you may care is because if I pick the winner and get anywhere near the right final score, you may just say, hey this red head knows a thing or two about predicting a game based solely on the uniforms and the image each coach portrays.…
I’ve been having a ton of sex lately. It’s been pretty amazing. It happens about 3-4 times a day. Sometimes it’s long carried out passionate sessions and sometimes they are brief–small and just the right amount.
I entered this relationship about a year ago. It began rather slowly. We were kids when we met. Who is this person you ask? Well, it’s not a person. …
I abbreviate almost everything. So if I were to rewrite the previous sentence it would read:
I abreev ev. These are common Bern (what my friends call me) terms my friends hear me use:
PMS= Perfect Man Shoe
LSD= Long Sexy Dress (you must be height appropriate to make LSD work)
LBD= Little Black Dress
BS= Blue Shoes
SIT ON YOUR MOUTH= (Loose Hungarian to English saying)= Stop Talking
YUMMA LAMMA DING DONG= Delicious, Thank You, More Please
LYLT= Love You Long Time
BALOOBAS= Insanity/Crazy/Out Of This World
FU-N= Fun
BONJOUR= Hello
MERRY CHRISTMAS= When I Say Bye to Someone Cuz Everyone is Usually so Damn Cheery During the Holidays
NOSTUESO= No one speaks twice until everyone speaks once (learned this during my corps year at
City Year).…
